Donald MouthAnus Is a 5th Grade Bully: Punch Him & He Stops And Cries Like a Diapered Baby

You know what really grinds my gears: The fact that we’ve got a grown-ass manchild in Donny ShitChompChute throwing tantrums like a toddler who shit his diaper, except this time the diaper is democracy and we’re all stuck smelling it.

When the Playground Bully Got Nuclear Codes

What happens with Wittle Donny bullies someone, and they PUNCH BACK

“The tyrant dies and his rule is over; the martyr dies and his rule begins.” - Søren Kierkegaard

The stench of desperation wafted through the digital airwaves like a backed-up septic tank on September 23rd, when Donald MunchShitChute decided to have another one of his legendary meltdowns. Picture this shit: ABC suspends Jimmy Kimmel’s late-night show on September 17th after FCC Chairman Brendan Carr - a bootlicking sycophant if there ever was one - starts crying about Kimmel’s comments regarding Charlie Kirk’s death and Trumpty MouthAnus’s response to the shooting. The network, displaying all the backbone of a jellyfish in a blender, cited the need for “thoughtful conversations” - which is corporate speak for “we’re scared shitless of the big bad bully and his army of mouth-breathing supporters.”

But here’s where the story gets fucking delicious. Six days later, ABC apparently found their balls rolling around somewhere in the executive bathroom and announced Kimmel’s return for September 23rd. The timing of what happened next is so perfect you couldn’t script this shit better if Aaron Sorkin was on a cocaine bender. Donaldo Shitsburger, sitting on his golden toilet (probably constipated from all those Big Macs), fires off a Truth Social post that reads like a toddler’s diary entry written in crayon and rage. He’s screaming about “Fake News,” claiming the White House was told the show was permanently canceled, threatening legal action, and taking swipes at Kimmel’s audience numbers - all while the smell of his own bullshit fills whatever gaudy room he’s rage-typing from.

The post lands like a wet turd on a wedding cake mere minutes before Kimmel’s scheduled return. You can practically taste the desperation in the air, thick and cloying like the cologne section at a department store. The Donald of Dumpster thought he’d won, thought he’d successfully bullied another critic into silence, only to discover that ABC had played him like the pathetic chump he is.

“Power does not corrupt. Fear corrupts… perhaps the fear of a loss of power.” - John Steinbeck

Now let’s get into the fucking meat of this thing. The political machinery that Donkey Trumpkins has built isn’t just about power - it’s about the systematic deployment of intimidation tactics that would make a mob boss blush. When he attacks journalists, he’s not just throwing shade; he’s orchestrating a deliberate campaign to destroy the fourth estate. Take Jim Acosta from CNN - remember that shit? November 2018, White House press conference, and Dookie Trump doesn’t just disagree with Acosta’s questions. No, this motherfucker has his press credentials revoked, literally strips him of his ability to do his job, then has his administration doctor a fucking video to justify it. They sped up footage to make it look like Acosta assaulted a female intern. Think about that for a second - they fabricated evidence to destroy a journalist’s career because Donald Shitsniffer couldn’t handle tough questions.

Or how about when he went after Megyn Kelly? The man literally implied she was menstruating during a debate because she asked him difficult questions. “Blood coming out of her wherever,” he said, his orange face contorting into that grotesque expression that haunts the nightmares of decent people everywhere. The crowd ate it up like pigs at a trough, the sound of their laughter mixing with the bile rising in every thinking person’s throat. This wasn’t just casual sexism - it was weaponized misogyny designed to send a message: challenge me and I’ll humiliate you in the most degrading way possible.

The pattern continues with Kaitlan Collins, banned from White House events for asking “inappropriate” questions - which is fascist-speak for “questions that make Turdalump Trump look bad.” April Ryan, a Black female journalist, was told she should be fired for shaking her head during a press briefing. The message was crystal fucking clear: conform or be destroyed. The smell of fear in those press rooms must have been overwhelming, journalists sweating through their shirts, wondering if today’s the day their career gets torched for doing their job.

“The philosophers have only interpreted the world in various ways; the point is to change it.” - Karl Marx

The Procedural Destruction of Democracy, One Tweet at a Time

Let me break down the actual fucking procedure of how Donny TurdATrump operates his bullying machine, because this shit is methodical. First, he identifies a target - usually someone with less power, someone who can’t fight back effectively. Then comes the public humiliation phase. He’ll craft a nickname, something juvenile and cruel that his base of knuckle-draggers can chant at rallies. “Crooked Hillary,” “Sleepy Joe,” “Pocahontas” - each one designed to reduce a human being to a caricature that fits in a fucking tweet.

“Man is born free, and everywhere he is in chains.” - Jean-Jacques Rousseau

Take Elizabeth Warren, for example. The “Pocahontas” attacks weren’t just racist jokes - they were a calculated destruction of her identity and credibility. Every time she tried to talk policy, Donald Dumpstump would invoke that name, and suddenly the conversation wasn’t about healthcare or economic reform; it was about her ancestry. The media, like trained fucking monkeys, would amplify it, and before you know it, a serious policy discussion has devolved into a circus act with Trump the Turd as the ringmaster.

The next step in his procedure? Amplification through his digital mob. When Donny ShitChompChute targets someone on social media, it’s not just his tweet that matters. Within minutes, thousands of his supporters descend like locusts, sending death threats, doxxing family members, making life a living hell for anyone who dared to cross their orange god. Remember Christine Blasey Ford? After she testified about Brett Kavanaugh, Donald MunchShitChute mocked her at a rally, imitating her testimony while his crowd of degenerates laughed and cheered. The sound must have been deafening - thousands of voices united in cruel mockery of a sexual assault survivor. Ford had to move four times, hire private security, and essentially go into hiding. That’s not politics; that’s terrorism with a MAGA hat.

“Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious.” - Peter Ustinov

The methodology extends to his treatment of disabled individuals. When he mocked New York Times reporter Serge Kovaleski - a man with arthrogryposis - Farty Donaldo didn’t just make fun of him once and move on. No, this sick fuck incorporated it into his routine, performing the mockery at multiple rallies, each time getting bigger laughs from his audience of moral degenerates. The visual was burned into America’s retinas: the potential leader of the free world, flailing his arms, contorting his face, reducing a human being’s disability to a punchline. The procedure here is clear: dehumanize, repeat, normalize. By the tenth time he did it, his supporters weren’t even shocked anymore. It had become part of the show, like a greatest hits album of cruelty.

The Military Mockery Machine

Now let’s talk about how this Donny Dingleberry systematically attacks military families and veterans - people who’ve sacrificed more for this country than his bone-spur-having ass ever will. The procedure here is particularly fucking vile because it targets people who are culturally revered in America. But Trumpy AssChatterChasm found a way.

Start with John McCain. A fucking war hero who spent five and a half years being tortured in a Vietnamese prison camp, refusing early release because it would have been dishonorable. Donald Shitsniffer’s response? “He’s not a war hero. He’s a war hero because he was captured. I like people who weren’t captured.” The words hang in the air like a toxic cloud, the kind that makes your eyes water and your throat close up. This wasn’t a one-off comment - Turdburg Trump continued attacking McCain even after the man died of brain cancer. He complained that the flags were at half-staff too long, bitched about not being thanked for the funeral, and continued to attack McCain’s legacy years after the man was in the ground.

The Gold Star family of Humayun Khan faced similar treatment. After Khizr Khan spoke at the Democratic National Convention, holding up his pocket Constitution (the sound of those pages rustling must have been like nails on a chalkboard to Donaldo Fartfisted), Trump’s response was to attack the grieving parents. He suggested the mother wasn’t allowed to speak because of their Muslim faith, implied the father had ulterior motives, and spent days making their lives hell. The procedure: attack, deflect, never apologize, and let your rabid base do the dirty work of continued harassment.

Or consider his treatment of Alexander Vindman, a Purple Heart recipient who testified during the impeachment hearings. The Dumping Donald didn’t just fire him - he fired his twin brother too, just for good measure. The message was clear as crystal meth at a trailer park: cross me and I’ll destroy not just you but everyone you love. The vindictiveness was so extreme that even some Republicans privately expressed disgust - though of course, being the spineless fucks they are, they did nothing about it.

“In the depth of winter, I finally learned that there was in me an invincible summer.” - Albert Camus

The Economic Extortion Racket

Let’s examine the procedure Donny McButtstain uses to economically destroy his enemies, because this shit is like a mob protection racket run by a man with the business acumen of a drunk toddler with a credit card. When companies don’t kiss his ring, he unleashes economic warfare that would make the Mafia say “hey, that’s a bit much.”

Take Amazon and Jeff Bezos. When the Washington Post (owned by Bezos) published critical coverage, Donald PoopTrump went after Amazon with the precision of a sledgehammer in a china shop. He ordered the Pentagon to review a $10 billion cloud computing contract that Amazon was favored to win, ultimately giving it to Microsoft. He pushed for postal rate increases specifically to hurt Amazon’s shipping costs. He tweeted attacks on the company constantly, each one causing stock fluctuations that wiped out billions in market value. The procedure: use government power to punish businesses whose owners criticize you. It’s like watching a toddler with nuclear codes trying to run a lemonade stand - except the lemonade is democracy and he’s pissing in it.

The NFL faced similar treatment when players kneeled during the national anthem. Cheatloaf didn’t just express disagreement - he called for boycotts, demanded owners fire players, and turned a protest about police brutality into a referendum on patriotism. The sound of cash registers not ringing must have been music to his ears as he celebrated declining ratings like it was a personal victory. He literally tried to economically destroy America’s most popular sport because some players had the audacity to peacefully protest.

Harley-Davidson, an American icon, faced his wrath when they moved some production overseas in response to his own fucking tariffs. The irony was completely lost on Donald BukakkeVictim as he called for boycotts of the company, telling his supporters to abandon a brand many had loved for decades. The procedure: create a problem, blame someone else for responding to it, then destroy them for not pretending your problem doesn’t exist.

The Judicial Intimidation Playbook

The way Donald CumSwallower attacks judges and the legal system follows a specific procedure that would make authoritarian dictators take notes. When Judge Gonzalo Curiel was presiding over the Trump University fraud case, Fartin’ Donald didn’t just question his rulings - he claimed the judge couldn’t be fair because of his Mexican heritage. The man was born in fucking Indiana, but to Donald ShitEater, brown skin means foreign, and foreign means enemy.

During his various legal troubles, the pattern remains consistent. Attack the judge personally, claim bias without evidence, rile up your base to send threats, and try to intimidate your way to a favorable ruling. Judge Arthur Engoron, overseeing his fraud trial, faced daily verbal assaults. Trumpington De ShittyGobhole would stand outside the courtroom like a deranged street preacher, ranting about injustice while the smell of his desperation filled the hallway. He posted pictures of the judge’s staff on social media, leading to death threats so severe that security had to be increased. The procedure is always the same: make it so dangerous and exhausting to hold him accountable that people just give up.

When judges issue gag orders to stop his intimidation campaigns, he violates them repeatedly, calculating that the fines are just the cost of doing business. Ten thousand here, fifteen thousand there - pocket change for a man who claims to be a billionaire but probably couldn’t buy a McDonald’s franchise without a loan from the Russians. Each violation is deliberate, designed to show that rules don’t apply to him, that he can bully even the judicial system into submission.

“Hell is other people.” - Jean-Paul Sartre

The Private Citizen Persecution Protocol

Perhaps the most fucked up part of Donny ShriveledEmptyNutsack’s bullying is how he targets private citizens - regular people just trying to live their goddamn lives. The procedure here is particularly cruel because these people have no platform to fight back, no security detail, no PR team. They’re just regular folks who suddenly find themselves in the crosshairs of a madman with millions of followers.

Ruby Freeman and Shaye Moss, two Black election workers in Georgia, became his targets after the 2020 election. These women were just doing their jobs, counting votes, participating in democracy. But Donald ProlapsedAsshole decided they were criminals, spreading lies about them passing USB drives like drug dealers (it was a fucking ginger mint), claiming they were stuffing ballot boxes. The result? Death threats so severe they had to leave their homes. Freeman had to shut down her business, change her appearance, essentially go into witness protection because she had the audacity to count votes while Black.

The procedure is always the same: identify someone who can’t fight back, make up lies about them, broadcast those lies to millions of rabid followers, then sit back and watch as their lives are destroyed. It’s like watching someone set fire to an ant with a magnifying glass, except the ant is a human being and the magnifying glass is social media.

Election workers across the country faced similar treatment. Their names and addresses posted online, their children threatened at school, their homes vandalized. The smell of spray paint on garage doors spelling out “TRAITOR,” the sound of breaking glass as windows are smashed, the taste of fear as they check their rearview mirrors constantly, wondering if today’s the day some MAGA psycho makes good on the threats.

“The secret source of humor is not joy but sorrow; there is no humor in Heaven.” - Mark Twain

The Whistleblower Destruction Department

The procedure for dealing with whistleblowers is particularly methodical. When someone from inside his administration dares to report wrongdoing, Trumpty MouthAnus doesn’t just dispute their claims - he sets out to fucking annihilate them. The Ukraine whistleblower, whose complaint led to his first impeachment, faced demands to be identified, to be confronted, to be “dealt with.” The Donald of Dumpster suggested they should be executed for treason, using language about “spies” and what “we used to do in the old days” - which is mob speak for “I want this person dead.”

Lt. Col. Alexander Vindman, who we mentioned earlier, didn’t just lose his job. His entire military career was destroyed. His brother was fired too, guilty by genetic association. They were escorted from the White House like criminals, their decades of service reduced to a perp walk because one of them dared to tell the truth under oath. The message to other potential whistleblowers was clear: speak up and we’ll destroy not just you but everyone you care about.

The pattern extends to anyone who cooperates with investigations. Michael Cohen, his former personal lawyer and fixer, went from being described as a “good man” to a “rat” the moment he decided to cooperate with prosecutors. The transformation in rhetoric was like watching Jekyll and Hyde, if both personalities were assholes and one was slightly more honest. Donkey Trumpkins used his platform to ensure Cohen’s legal troubles were amplified, his credibility destroyed, his family threatened.

The Democracy Destruction Timeline

Let’s trace the fucking timeline of how this systematic bullying has evolved, because this shit didn’t happen overnight. It’s been a methodical dismantling of democratic norms, one bully tactic at a time.

Yes, Secretly in the 80s I wanted to be Molly Ringwald

It started during the 2016 campaign with the “Lock her up” chants about Hillary Clinton. The sound of thousands of voices baying for the imprisonment of a political opponent should have been the canary in the coal mine, except the canary was dead and the mine was already filling with poison gas. The procedure was established: identify enemy, create chant, repeat until violence seems inevitable.

The press became the “enemy of the people” - language straight out of Stalin’s playbook, but delivered with all the sophistication of a drunk uncle at Thanksgiving. Journalists started needing security details just to cover his rallies. The smell of fear-sweat in those press pens must have been overwhelming, reporters wondering if today’s the day some MAGA fanatic decides to “deal with” the enemy of the people.

By 2020, the bullying had evolved into attempting to overturn an election. The procedure: claim fraud without evidence, bully state officials to “find” votes, threaten anyone who won’t go along with the lie. Brad Raffensperger, Georgia’s Secretary of State, received death threats for refusing to “find 11,780 votes.” The exact number needed to flip the state - what a fucking coincidence. His wife received sexual threats, his daughter-in-law was threatened, all because he wouldn’t participate in Dookie Trump’s attempted coup.

January 6th was the culmination of years of bullying tactics. The procedure had been refined: identify enemies (Congress, Mike Pence, democracy itself), rile up your base with lies, point them at the target, and let violence do what words couldn’t. The sound of glass breaking in the Capitol, the smell of tear gas and shit (literally, they smeared feces on the walls), the sight of a noose erected for the Vice President - this was Donald Shitsniffer’s bullying methodology taken to its logical conclusion.

“Power does not corrupt men; fools, however, if they get into a position of power, corrupt power.” - George Bernard Shaw

The International Intimidation Initiative

The bullying doesn’t stop at America’s borders. Turdalump Trump’s procedure for dealing with international allies and enemies follows the same pattern of intimidation and humiliation. Remember when he shoved the Prime Minister of Montenegro out of the way at a NATO summit? The physical embodiment of his entire foreign policy: push everyone else aside and pretend you’re the only one who matters.

He publicly humiliated Angela Merkel, refused to shake her hand, and acted like a petulant child during their meetings. The most powerful woman in Europe, reduced to rolling her eyes at the orange toddler throwing tantrums about trade deficits. He called Justin Trudeau “two-faced” and “weak,” storming out of summits like a teenager who just got grounded. The procedure: treat allies like enemies, suck up to dictators, and wonder why America’s standing in the world collapsed faster than Trump Steaks.

With dictators, the procedure reversed. He praised Kim Jong Un’s “beautiful letters,” saluted North Korean generals, and talked about how they “fell in love.” The same man who bullied democratically elected allies was suddenly writing love letters to a dictator who feeds his enemies to dogs. The cognitive dissonance would be funny if it wasn’t so fucking terrifying.

The Current State of the Shitshow

Which brings us back to Jimmy Kimmel and the present fucking moment. The procedure remains unchanged: identify critic, attempt to destroy them, throw tantrum when it doesn’t work. But something’s different now. ABC brought Kimmel back. The intimidation didn’t work. The bully threw his best punch and missed.

The pattern is starting to break. Journalists are fighting back, winning lawsuits, refusing to be intimidated. Judges are imposing real consequences, issuing gag orders with teeth. Private citizens are suing for defamation and winning. The procedure that worked for so long is finally meeting resistance.

But make no mistake - Donny TurdATrump isn’t done. The bullying will continue because it’s all he fucking knows. It’s his only move, his sole strategy, his entire personality. Without bullying, he’s just an old man with bad hair and worse ideas, screaming into the void of Truth Social while the world moves on.

The smell of desperation is getting stronger, like a corpse flower blooming in a heat wave. The sound of his rage-typing grows more frantic, each post more unhinged than the last. The sight of his followers, once an army, now looking more like a confused mob wondering why their leader keeps losing. The taste of defeat, bitter and unavoidable, creeping into every interaction.

“The truth will set you free, but first it will piss you off.” - Gloria Steinem

The procedure for dealing with a bully is simple: you stand up to them. You call out their shit. You refuse to be intimidated. You laugh at their threats. You expose their weakness. And eventually, inevitably, they crumble. Because bullies are, at their core, the weakest fucking people on the planet. And Donald PoopTrump, for all his bluster and threats, for all his procedures and patterns, is just a weak, pathetic bully whose time is running out.

So yeah, that’s what grinds my fucking gears. That we’ve allowed this systematic bullying to go on for so long, that we’ve watched this procedure play out victim after victim, and only now are we starting to fight back. But at least we’re fighting. At least people like Kimmel are returning to their shows, middle finger raised high. At least the procedure is finally, fucking finally, starting to fail.

Because in the end, bullies don’t win. They just make a lot of noise before they lose. And Cheatloaf? He’s making more noise than ever, which means he knows what’s coming. The procedure is breaking down. The bullying isn’t working. And soon, very fucking soon, the only person left to bully will be himself.