Preznit Fuckwit & KKKaroline Leavitt: Democrats Need To Be Executed

You Know What Really Grinds My Gears: When a Twice-Impeached Fuckwit Stands Before Business Leaders and Claims He Invented the American Dream While His Press Secretary Gaslights Us About Starving Children

The stench of bullshit has a particular quality when it’s been left to ferment in the Miami sun. It’s thick, cloying, the kind of smell that coats the back of your throat and makes you want to retch. That’s the sensory experience of watching Donny ShitChompChute deliver an hour-long verbal diarrhea stream to business leaders who apparently forgot they were supposed to be, you know, businesspeople capable of basic fucking arithmetic. The taste of bile rises when you realize these dumbass executives sat there nodding like those dashboard dogs while this shitbrained carnival barker claimed he single-handedly restored American sovereignty on November 5th—only to lose some of it last night, but don’t worry, dipshits, we’ll get it back soon.

But what happens when the man thrown into power refuses responsibility for anything except imaginary victories? What do we call it when the fuckstick-in-chief brags about winning 86% of counties as if dirt and cornfields cast ballots?

Let me paint you a picture of this cockwaffle’s performance. Picture a bloated tick engorged on its own mythology, wobbling across a stage in front of people who should know better. The Donald of Dumpster starts by calling himself “a very modest man”—and I shit you not, the cognitive dissonance didn’t immediately cause a singularity that swallowed South Florida whole. This shitgobbling narcissist then spends the next fifty-nine minutes contradicting that opening lie with the kind of shameless self-aggrandizement that would make a televangelist blush.

“Remember the McDonald’s shoot?” he wheezes, probably still tasting the grease. “Biggest hit in the history of Google.”

The. History. Of. Google.

Not the most-searched term. Not a trending topic. The biggest hit in the history of a company that processes 8.5 billion searches per day. This cocksucking douchenozzle genuinely believes—or wants his audience to believe—that him cosplaying as a fry cook for a photo op somehow broke the internet harder than literally anything else that has ever existed on Google’s servers.

And brother, we are drowning in absurdity thick enough to choke on.

Here’s where the shitshow goes from merely stupid to dangerously delusional. Trumpington De ShittyGobhole claims we have:

Then, in the same breath—the same goddamn breath—he admits “many people can’t see it yet.”

Translation for those playing along at home: I’m lying my ass off, but you’ll believe me anyway because you’re a bunch of gutless dicklickers who’d rather swallow my bullshit than admit you voted for a con artist.

The evidence keeps mounting like a putrid asscrack in August humidity. This buttfuck claims he’s brought in $18 trillion in investments, shooting for $21 trillion by year’s end. The actual number from White House.gov? Less than $10 trillion. He’s not rounding up. He’s not being optimistic. He’s pulling numbers out of his withered rectum and serving them up like they’re filet mignon to people who should be able to afford calculators.

But what do we call someone who doesn’t even know his own goddamn statistics?

The Lies Compound:

• Claims GDP growth in Q2 2025 was “triple or quadruple every other nation in the entire world”

• Can’t commit to which lie he’s telling because he doesn’t know and doesn’t care

• Rambles about buildings so massive they could “cover the island of Manhattan”

Let me break down that last one: Manhattan is 636 million square meters. The ten largest buildings on Earth combined? Under 20 million square meters. This shitstain is off by a factor of thirty-three. And nobody in that room said, “Hey, you dumbfuck, that’s physically impossible.”

The silence of complicity has its own sound—a high-pitched whine like tinnitus mixed with the whistle of spines dissolving into jelly.

Watching this shitshow, you realize Russell was being optimistic. These aren’t mere fools. They’re weaponized dipshits.

Now let’s talk about the beautiful parallel performance: Not Michael Jackson—sorry, Kkkaroline Leavitt—standing at the press podium looking like she raided her mom’s 1987 shoulder-pad collection before a suburban wine-mom night out. This shitweasel spent thirty-five minutes vomiting propaganda with the kind of conviction that makes you wonder if she actually believes her own crap or if she’s just that good at swallowing lies.

Fourteen times she mentioned Biden. Fourteen. At a press briefing that’s supposed to be about current policy. But the dead horse isn’t dead enough for these fucksticks—they need to keep beating it until it’s paste, until it’s molecular dust, until they can inhale the particles and get high on their own victimhood.

She bleats this, and you can practically smell the sulfur of the lie burning. Not “fighting to expand healthcare access.” Not “trying to maintain ACA subsidies.” Nope—it’s all about giving free shit to scary brown people because that’s what plays with the base of racist shitheads who think healthcare is a zero-sum game.

But what dignity exists when your press secretary stands before the nation and lies about why forty-two million people are about to lose food assistance?

Here’s where my rage reaches a temperature hot enough to melt steel: Leavitt casually mentions that casinos and hotels and convention bureaus signed a letter complaining about lost revenue during the shutdown.

Casinos. Fucking casinos are her evidence that Americans should care.

Not the families who won’t eat. Not the kids who’ll go hungry. Not the diabetics who’ll ration insulin. No—think of the poor fucking casinos and their profit margins.

The moral bankruptcy is so complete it’s achieved a kind of perfection, like a pristine void where human decency used to exist.

Let’s dissect one specific lie because it deserves the forensic attention of an autopsy. Trumpty MouthAnus claims he’s “already gotten you no tax on tips, no tax on overtime, and no tax on Social Security.” Already. Past tense. Accomplished.

Except—and I cannot stress this enough—every single American reading this is still paying taxes on tips, overtime, and Social Security. Every. Single. One. This isn’t a policy debate. This isn’t competing interpretations of data. This is a lie so blatant, so easily disprovable, that telling it requires either complete contempt for your audience or brain damage from decades of snorting Adderall and Big Mac grease.

THE RECEIPTS:

According to the IRS’s own guidelines published as recently as October 2025:

That’s not Biden’s IRS. That’s not the deep state. That’s the fucking Internal Revenue Service under Donaldo Shitsburger’s own administration, still requiring tip taxation.

But wait—it gets more deliciously fucked. The dickwad actually signed the bill that guarantees furloughed government workers get back pay. When asked if he’ll honor it, Leavitt says, “I’m not gonna answer that.” Then doubles down. Then triples down by cutting off follow-up questions. They’re not even pretending to honor their own goddamn legislation.

Watching this government in action, you understand why he was thinking about it. The absurdity isn’t just philosophical—it’s weaponized, deliberate, calculated to make you feel crazy for noticing that words no longer mean things and promises are just sounds that fall dead from lying mouths.

The systemic rot is comprehensive. We have a president who thinks the term “American Dream” was invented when he took office in 2017, disappeared in 2021, and returned when he reclaimed power. This fucknut genuinely believes—or wants you to believe—that a concept dating back to 1931 didn’t exist until he waddled into the Oval Office.

The historical illiteracy is staggering, but it’s also strategic. If you can convince people that you invented hope itself, you can sell them anything.

We have a press secretary who says “any executive order the president signs is legal within the confines of the law.”

Read that again. Any. Executive. Order. Is legal. Within the confines of the law.

The tautological horseshit of that statement would be funny if it wasn’t terrifying. It’s the logic of autocracy wrapped in the language of legality.

The Casual Murder State:

The shitbird-in-chief brags about “blowing up boats in the Caribbean,” murdering people based on suspicion, and Leavitt calls this “transparency.” The water is “littered with drug dust” according to Donnie TurdATrump, as if cocaine works like pixie dust and you can just look for sparkles on the ocean surface.

• Casual discussion of extrajudicial killings

• Complete absence of due process

• Celebration of state-sponsored murder

This is the country we’re becoming while business leaders applaud and reporters take notes.

Here’s the hypocrisy that makes my blood boil hot enough to cook eggs on my forehead: These same buttfucks who claim Democrats are trying to install communism are the ones demanding:

The projection is so intense it could screen IMAX films on the moon.

Turdalump Trump calls South Africa a communist country three times. Three. South Africa has a mixed economy, private property rights, and a stock exchange. But facts are for shitheads who care about reality, and we’re living in a post-truth dickhead dimension where words mean whatever serves the narrative.

THE TARIFF TRUTH:

The National Bureau of Economic Research published data in September 2025 showing that Trump’s tariffs have functionally operated as a tax increase on American consumers to the tune of $1,800 per household annually. <2>

Not foreign countries paying. Not China absorbing costs. American families eating the expense. But Trumpington De ShittyGobhole stands before business leaders and claims he’s brought in trillions—money that came from your pocket, redistributed to connected industries, and called it victory.

Meanwhile, Leavitt promises to cut the deficit by $600 billion this year. The federal deficit is projected at $1.8 trillion for fiscal 2025. So they’re claiming to cut a third of it while simultaneously implementing tax cuts that will cost $3.5 trillion over ten years.

The math doesn’t math. But math is for libshit elites who believe in things like “addition” and “fiscal reality.”

The synthesis of all this shit is clear: We have a government run by fuckwits who lie reflexively, supporters who believe those lies religiously, and a media apparatus too chickenshit to call it what it is.

Not “misstatements.” Not “alternative facts.” Not “optimistic projections.”

Lies. Big, sweaty, throbbing lies told by shitheads who know they’re lying to dumbasses who don’t care that they’re being lied to.

What does it say about us that we’ve chosen this? What does it say that business leaders sit through an hour of mathematical impossibilities and historical fabrications without walking out? What does it say that reporters ask about policies that don’t exist and accept non-answers as if they’re journalism?

The stink of this moment will linger long after these dickwads are gone. It’ll seep into the groundwater of our institutions, poison the soil of our civic culture, and leave a residue that our children will taste when they wonder how we let it get this bad. We’re not witnessing politics. We’re watching the autopsy of a democracy that’s still twitching, still technically alive, but too far gone to save without radical intervention.

And the worst part—the part that makes me want to scream until my throat bleeds—is that tomorrow, Donaldo Fartfisted will tell new lies, Leavitt will gaslight new victims, and the same fuckwit business leaders will applaud again. The same dickless reporters will take notes. The same spineless masses will shrug and say, “That’s just how it is.”

But that’s not how it has to be. That’s never been how it has to be. That’s just how it is when enough people decide that dignity costs too much and truth is too heavy to carry.

The question isn’t whether we’ll survive this. We will. Cockroaches and liars always survive. The question is what we’ll have become by the time we do.