Tuesday RoundUp: Every Rose Has It's Thorn, Right?

Just like every night has its dawn

A Sapphic Voice in the Madness

The fucking market crashed because Donny McFartSalot launched his idiotic tariff war, then mysteriously "paused" it after telling everyone to "BUY!" His lesbian niece Mary Trump called him out, suggesting this reeks of market manipulation. "The man is a menace because he is profoundly stupid, weak, and degraded," she wrote, explaining his financial incompetence stems from daddy's endless cash flow. Despite the market rebounding, the damage lingers—frayed trade alliances, rising inflation, and America's torched reputation. This wasn't strategy; it was a weak, pathetic loser being manipulated by someone whispering "get richer" in his ear.

Another Sapphic Voice Speaks

MSNBC's host Rachel Maddow couldn't stop laughing at Doug "The Diva" Burgum's absurd demands. This cookie-obsessed Secretary of the Interior forces political appointees—paid by YOUR fucking tax dollars—to bake fresh cookies and remake "subpar" batches. He also demands bottled water labels be removed and staff act as personal waiters. When called out, his office pathetically defended him: "It's store-bought dough they only need to bake!" What horseshit from an administration supposedly fighting "government waste." As Maddow mockingly said, "If the secretary was removing his own water bottle labels, he might not get to the cookies in time."

Peace Sells, But Who’s Buying: Well It’s Not The Anti-Trans Crowd

This anti-trans bullshit is already paying big dividends. Stephanie Turner, the cowardly fencer who refused to compete against trans woman Redmond Sullivan, just pocketed a $5000 "Courage Wins Award" from XX-XY Athletics—a company that profits from transphobia. Turner disqualified herself by taking a knee (stealing Black athletes' protest against actual fucking oppression) rather than face Sullivan, who placed a measly 24th out of 39 competitors. Jennifer Sey, the company's founder, called Turner "a hero" while promoting this lucrative victim complex. Meanwhile, anti-trans grifters like Riley Gaines rake in $30,000 speaking fees while destroying actual teenage athletes' scholarships.

Marjorie Taylor Greene is a Lying Cheating Bitch

House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries finally endorsed a fucking stock trading ban after that lying, cheating bitch Marjorie Taylor Greene reportedly cashed in on Trump's tariff clusterfuck. The New York Times caught her making trades worth up to $315,000 just days before Donny McShitstorm "paused" his economy-wrecking tariffs. "So many of these people are crooks, liars and frauds. And Marjorie Taylor Greene is, of course, exhibit A," Jeffries said. AOC ripped into Greene at a rally: "How much did you make off of people's despair?" The corrupt timing reeks of market manipulation to "quietly enrich his friends who bought the dip."

Elon Musk is a Lying Cheating AssWaffle

Trump's corrupt administration just got slapped with another fucking lawsuit for illegally hiding how they spend YOUR tax dollars. These shady bastards took down a federally mandated website tracking agency funding disbursements "without explanation"—like Elon MicroPhallus pulling some lying, cheating asswaffle cocksuck move. When caught, budget director Russell Vought pathetically claimed the site revealed "sensitive information," but the Government Accountability Office called bullshit: "We disagree." This reeks of deliberate concealment, especially regarding how they're funding Trump's "Department of Government Efficiency" scam. Democracy watchdogs are now dragging these lawbreakers to court—exactly where they belong.

Fear is a Fucking Weapon, That’s What the Fuck it Is

WorldPride organizers just issued a fucking travel warning for transgender people coming to America thanks to Donny TurdTrump's bigoted policies. His administration has suspended the ability for trans folks to update their passports, creating a goddamn nightmare for international travelers with documents that don't match their identity. Denmark and Finland are already warning their trans citizens about visiting the US, while reports surface of passports being forcibly changed back to birth sex. Meanwhile, corporate sponsors are ditching WorldPride out of fear. As Council of Governors Vice Chair Charles Allen said, these "incredibly shameful tactics" from the federal administration are using "fear as a weapon."

Citations

1. Sprayregen, M. 2025 “Donald Trump’s gay niece explains how his childhood led to the “profoundly stupid” tariff debacle” LGBTQNation

2. Sprayregen, M. 2025 “Rachel Maddow brutally mocks Cabinet secretary who demands staff bake him cookies & serve him food” LGBTQNation

3. Russell, J. 2025 “Anti-trans fencer gets $5000 cash prize for refusing to compete against trans woman” LGBTQNation

4. Sutter, T. 2025 “Jeffries backs stock trading ban after Greene buys market dip” The Hill

5. Migdon B. 2025 “WorldPride organizers caution transgender visitors from abroad” The Hill

6. Folley, A. 2025 “Trump administration sued after taking down public spending tracker” The Hill

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