So As we continue to watch retirement funds go down into the fucking toilet, and watch entire human protections swathed away, Welcome to day whatever the fuck in the Trump Dystopia
FSU Bloodbath: Another Fucking Day in America's Gun Paradise
In yet another goddamn American tragedy, at least two people were murdered and multiple others wounded when a gunman unleashed hell at Florida State University today. This marks Florida's SIXTH mass shooting this year aloneโbecause why the fuck not in a country that worships firearms?
Here's the bloody timeline of this clusterfuck:
Around 11:50am, 20-year-old Phoenix Ikner, son of a Leon County sheriff deputy and reportedly an FSU student, opened fire near the student union. Campus police responded immediately, taking down this piece of shit who "did not comply with commands." Two non-students are dead, five others shot, with six total hospitalized.
The most infuriating part? This asshole had access to mommy's weapons because she works at the sheriff's office. The handgun was her old service weapon, with a shotgun found in the union and another gun in his car.
Meanwhile, President Turdbucket Trump called it "a shame" while jerking off the Second Amendment. "The gun doesn't do the shooting, the people do," he spewed from the Oval Office, making it crystal clear he won't do jack shit about America's gun epidemic.
Trump's War on Trans Athletes: Maine Governor Fights Back against Federal Bullying
Holy shit, The Donald of Dumpster's administration is now suing Maine's Department of Education for allowing transgender girls to play sports with other girls. This latest attack comes after Maine already had to fight to keep federal funding to feed fucking CHILDREN and DISABLED ADULTS that Trump's administration tried to withhold.
U.S. Attorney General Pam Bondi announced this lawsuit with the bullshit claim they're "fighting for women"โwhile actually fighting to starve kids and discriminate against trans youth.
Maine Governor Janet Mills isn't taking this crap lying down: "Today is the latest, expected salvo in an unprecedented campaign to pressure the State of Maine to ignore the Constitution and abandon the rule of law. This matter has never been about school sports or the protection of women and girls, as has been claimed, it is about states rights and defending the rule of law against a federal government bent on imposing its will."
The Trump administration's vindictive investigations were completed in just FOUR DAYS without interviewing a single state officialโa process that normally takes months. This isn't governance; it's a fucking witch hunt.
Mills warned other states: "Maine might be among the first to draw the ire of the Federal government in this way, but we will not be the last."
Scientific research shows trans athletes post-transition are "more similar to their gender identity"โbut Donaldo Shitspitter doesn't give a shit about science when there are vulnerable kids to bully. [The Advocate]
Chicago Teachers Union Victory: A Middle Finger to Donny Turdman's Anti-LGBTQ+ Crusade
In a time when schools across America are being bullied into erasing queer existence, Chicago educators just showed what actual fucking resistance looks like. The Chicago Teachers Union's new contract isn't just a labor winโit's a battle cry for LGBTQ+ rights in the face of relentless attacks from Donald McStinkface's administration.
The contract, ratified by a staggering 97% of union members, tells conservative book-banners and trans-youth targeters to go fuck themselves by codifying some of the most comprehensive LGBTQ+ protections ever included in a public school labor deal.
"This contract isn't just about survival โ it's about joy," said Bridget Doherty Trebing, an art teacher and mother of a transgender seventh grader. "It tells our students: we see you, we protect you, and you are safe here."
What makes this contract revolutionary? Every school gets a trained Gender Support Coordinator, ironclad protections for chosen names and pronouns, inclusive curriculum requirements, and support for student-led Gender and Sexuality Alliances. While the Turdbucket Trump administration threatens to pull funding from inclusive schools, Chicago is doubling down on protecting its most vulnerable kids.
CTU President Stacy Davis Gates didn't mince words: "If you are not a wealthy, white, land-owning male, you are in the crosshairs of the current occupants of Pennsylvania Avenue. Public school is one of the last democratic institutions that centers equity โ and that's exactly why it's being attacked."
LGBTQ+ Committee co-chair Corey Blake, who helped craft these protections, put it perfectly: "Even if the federal government continues to wage its war against queer and trans youth, we have this protection. We made sure it's written in. We made sure it's real."
The impact goes beyond Chicago. Families are literally fleeing anti-LGBTQ+ states to find safety in Chicago schools. "That breaks my heart," Trebing said. "But it also reminds me why this work matters." Her trans son summed it up: "I'm so glad I'm in Chicago."
GLSEN executive director Melanie Willingham-Jaggers praised the contract: "Progress is possible when educators and schools focus on what is best for learning in their communities instead of what is convenient for extremist politicians seeking the national spotlight."
Most importantly, Chicago refused to water down protections in anticipation of federal backlash. "Absolutely no way should we have watered down this contract to comply in advance with these insane directives from Trump," Trebing declared. "We're going to do what's right for our students. Period."
The message to every queer kid in Chicago is crystal clear: "You are safe here. You are loved here. And we will fight like hell to keep it that way." [The Advocate]
RFK Jr.: โI Will Discriminate Against Trans Persons, Because Itโs Legalโ
Kennedy Jr. is hell-bent on attacking trans people from every fucking angle possible. Now he's declaring that gender dysphoria isn't protected under Section 504 of the Rehabilitation Act anymore, effectively giving a green light to discriminate against trans people with disabilities.
In a memo dripping with bureaucratic cruelty, RFK Jr. wrote: "Language in the preamble concerning gender dysphoria, which language is not included in the regulatory text, does not have the force or effect of law. Therefore, it cannot be enforced." This smug "abundance of caution" bullshit is just code for "go ahead and discriminate, we've got your back."
LGBTQ+ legislative researcher Allison Chapman didn't mince words: "Removing gender dysphoria as a protected disability is yet another angle of attack on transgender rights by the Trump administration. This opens up those with gender dysphoria to discrimination in the workplace, school, and pretty much all aspects of life, without legal recourse."
This follows 17 GOP attorneys general filing a lawsuit that disability advocates fear could threaten the entire statute that protects 1.6 million students with disabilities.
Disability justice advocates are fighting back. As DISrupt West Virginia declared: "504 has protected disabled people for 50 years. If they think we'll let them gut it without a fight, they haven't met DISrupt." [LGBTQNation]
Freedom of Hate: JD Vance Wants the UK to End LGBTQIA+ Protections
Donald McStinkface's administration is trying to strong-arm the UK into ditching its hate speech protections as part of a fucking trade dealโessentially demanding the right for bigots to incite violence against LGBTQ+ people. This isn't just policy; it's blackmail with real human lives at stake.
While the UK currently prohibits inciting hatred based on sexual orientation and gender identity, Donny McFartsalot's team is pressuring Prime Minister Starmer to trash these protections or kiss a trade deal goodbye. The message is crystal clear: either let people advocate violence against minorities or suffer economic consequences.
An unnamed Washington source put it bluntly: "No free speech, no deal. It is as simple as that." They revealed J.D. Vance is "obsessed by the fall of Western civilisation" and views hate speech laws as the problemโnot, you know, actual fucking hatred or the real-world violence it sparks. This twisted worldview sees protecting vulnerable groups as somehow more dangerous than allowing calls for their persecution.
Vance creepily emphasized America and Britain's "cultural affinity," adding: "fundamentally, America is an Anglo country"โa dog whistle so loud it could shatter windows. The message reeks of white nationalist undertones while he feigns concern about "fundamental values."
Meanwhile, UK Secretary Jonathan Reynolds pushed back: "I don't support the kind of approach to unilateral tariffs that the U.S. has pursued. We've made that very clear to our U.S. friends and colleagues." But with economic pressure mounting, how long before principles crack under the weight of profit margins?
This isn't about free speechโit's about weaponizing trade to export American-style hate politics globally. The Trump-Vance vision would let bigots light the match of violence while claiming they're just speaking their mind. [LGBTQNation]
UK Court: Trans Women Are Not Women, and Now What In The Fuck?
The UK's Supreme Court just took a sledgehammer to trans rights, ruling trans women aren't legally women under the 2010 Equality Actโand the aftermath is a fucking trainwreck of confusion.
Labour Minister Karin Smyth couldn't answer a simple question about which locker rooms trans women should use, stammering about "a large complex issue" while providing zero clarity. Meanwhile, Equality Commission Chair Baroness Falkner coldly declared: "It means single sex services, like changing rooms, must be based on biological sex." She suggested trans people should beg for "third spaces"โbecause apparently basic dignity is now a special privilege.
Scottish Trans leader Vic Valentine didn't mince words: "The judgment seems to have totally missed what matters to trans people โ that we are able to live our lives and be recognized in line with who we truly are."
Kerrie Meyer from Shetland Islands Pride warned the ruling puts the "security and wellbeing of all transgender people... in jeopardy." [LGBTQNation]
Constitutional Crisis: Donny Convict and Court Defiance
We're watching a full-blown constitutional crisis unfold as Donny McDumpstain openly pisses on Supreme Court orders. House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries didn't mince words, suggesting the Court could drop the contempt hammer on Cabinet secretaries if Trump's administration keeps wiping its ass with their ruling.
"The Supreme Court needs to take a close look at enforcing its orders," Jeffries told CNN, pointing out that Cabinet officials responsible for implementation could face consequences.
This clusterfuck centers on Kilmar Armando Abrego Garcia, mistakenly deported to El Salvador. The Court ordered the administration to "facilitate" his return, but a federal judge confirmed they haven't done jackshit.
When asked if we're in a "constitutional crisis," Jeffries nailed it: "We're in a crisis across the board, right?" He urged the courts to "lean into that" and "use all of the tools available" against this blatant defiance. [CNN]
AmeriCorps Gutting: Government Efficiency My Ass
The so-called "Department of Government Efficiency" just took a sledgehammer to AmeriCorps, booting disaster relief volunteers with zero warning. These people show up when towns are underwater or burning, and now they're being shown the door.
Sierra Club's Gerry Seavo James called the program "a critical pillar" of disaster relief. While climate disasters hammer communities like brass knuckles to the face, these bureaucratic assholes pull the rug from the very people keeping communities alive. America's Service Commissions is "alarmed"โfucking right! Volunteers got an email basically saying "thanks, now get lost" due to vague "circumstances."
The timing is beyond fucked. With extreme weather turning neighborhoods into warzones, we're cutting the people who help pick up the pieces? Like firing firefighters during wildfire season. Pure madness. [CNN]
Trade Wars: The Truth Behind Trump's EU Bullshit
Donaldo Shitsburger has accused the EU of "screwing" America over trade, but that's pure horseshit. The reality is far more complex than what spews from his mouth.
The US-EU trade relationship is massive โ $1.4 trillion in 2023, roughly $5 billion every fucking day. Yes, America ran a $125 billion trade deficit with the EU last year, but that's primarily in goods, not services.
The truth that Trumpy McButtface conveniently ignores? America dominates in selling services to Europe โ business consulting, financial services, and intellectual property rights. Meanwhile, we import cars, machinery, and pharmaceuticals.
This nuanced exchange isn't the one-sided ass-kicking he portrays. It's a complex, interdependent relationship where both sides benefit differently. So next time Donald McStinkface starts ranting about trade, remember he's selling you oversimplified garbage that stinks worse than month-old cheese. [CNN]
Harvard Sucks: So They Have To Pay Taxes Now
Donkey Trumpkins is now threatening to fuck over tax-exempt groups after siccing the IRS on Harvard's ass. He sneered that tax exemption is "a privilege" that's been "abused," while calling Harvard "a disgrace" and eyeing Columbia and Princeton too. This power-hungry bastard hinted at targeting immigrant and environmental organizations next, specifically calling out CREW who he claims only exists to "go after Donald Trump." All this vindictive bullshit comes while he's gutting the federal government and forcing 20,000 IRS employees to take buyouts. His petty vendetta against higher education reveals the thin-skinned tyrant beneath the spray tan. [TheHill]