You know what keeps me up at night: Did Trumpy McShitpants just lie about bombing Iran's nuclear facilities?
In the fucking chaos of this June evening, Donny McStinker claims a "very successful attack" on Iranian nuclear sitesโbut the visceral truth reeks of bullshit. Let me break this steaming pile down for you.
The air feels thick with deception tonight. Turdbucket Trump boasted about a "full payload of BOMBS" dropped on Fordow, with B2 bombers supposedly completing this mission. He's strutting around like a peacock with a hard-on, claiming "NOW IS THE TIME FOR PEACE!" after allegedly bombing the shit out of another country.
But here's where it gets fucking interestingโthe stench of contradiction is unmistakable. White House officials are saying this cockwomble is still "weighing a decision" on whether to strike Iran's nuclear facilities. The bitter taste of lies lingers like month-old milk.
The Donald of Dumpster wants us to believe he's both bombed Iran AND is still deciding whether to bomb Iran. That's some next-level mindfuckery right there.
Psychologically, this reeks of narcissistic power playโcreating a reality where he's simultaneously the decisive warrior and the thoughtful diplomat. The cognitive dissonance is enough to make your fucking brain explode.
Philosophically, we're witnessing the collapse of truth itself. When reality becomes whatever bullshit a leader spews on social media, we're living in a post-truth nightmare where facts are just suggestions.
The sound of these contradictions should alarm every citizen with a functioning brain. You can almost hear the machinery of democracy grinding to a halt as truth becomes optional.
So which is it? Did we bomb the shit out of Iran or not? The bitter reality is that in this moment, we don't fucking knowโand that uncertainty itself is the most terrifying thing of all.
Our Congressional Ass-Fucks Weigh In
"This is not Constitutional." - Rep. Thomas Massie of Kentucky
"Trump's strikes against Iran are not only unconstitutional, but an escalation that risks bringing the U.S. into another endless and deadly war." - Rep. Sara Jacobs of California
"A nuclear-armed Iran endangers America, Israel, and the entire free world. The U.S. took decisive action to destroy Iran's nuclear capability, protecting American lives, our allies, and global stability." - Rep. Andy Harris from Maryland
"Pres. Trump is protecting America." - Rep. Don Bacon of Nebraska
"Well done, President @realDonaldTrump. To my fellow citizens: We have the best Air Force in the world. It makes me so proud." - Sen. Lindsey Graham of South Carolina
"President Trump made the courageous and correct decision to eliminate the Iranian nuclear threat. God Bless the USA. Thank you to our extraordinary military and our indomitable @POTUS This is what leadership on the world stage looks like." - Sen. John Cornyn of Texas
"As I've long maintained, this was the correct move by @POTUS. Iran is the world's leading sponsor of terrorism and cannot have nuclear capabilities. I'm grateful for and salute the finest military in the world." - Sen. John Fetterman of Pennsylvania
Psychologically, it's fucking wild how these quotes reveal instant tribal positioningโconstitutional concerns versus national security circle-jerking. The sensory experience is like hearing two completely different languages being spoken simultaneously.
Philosophically, this shitshow exposes the eternal tension between legality and perceived necessity. Some smell blood in the water and rush to justify violence, while others taste the bitter reality of constitutional overreach.
The visceral contrast between those crying "unconstitutional" and those creaming themselves over "courageous" action shows just how deeply fucked our political discourse has become.
The Stench of Selective Intelligence
Picture this nightmare: bombs are dropping on Iran, the Middle East is about to go up in flames like a gasoline-soaked bonfire, and half of the Gang of Eight โ the supposedly sacred bipartisan group entrusted with our nation's most sensitive intelligence โ are sitting there with their thumbs up their asses, completely in the dark. Jim Himes and Mark Warner, ranking Democrats who've dedicated their careers to national security oversight, were left out in the cold like abandoned dogs while their Republican counterparts got the VIP treatment from the White House.
The psychological implications of this selective briefing bullshit are more toxic than a chemical spill in your drinking water. This isn't just about information sharing โ it's about power, control, and the deliberate weaponization of intelligence access to maintain partisan advantage. When you exclude half of the constitutionally mandated oversight body, you're not just breaking protocol; you're taking a steaming shit on the very foundations of democratic governance.
One person after another from Congress is saying we did and we didnโt bomb Iran !
Somebody please call someone in Iran thatโs close to the announced targets and tell us what they do or donโt see .
Lies from Trump would be nothing new. He would drop bombs as a kiss to Bibi or to just change the subject.