Wendy's Healing Compendium 42.69: The Berry That Makes You Say WTF

Red Chokeberry (Aronia arbutifolia) is one sneaky little plant that's been hiding in plain sight while other berries get all the damn attention. This tough shrub has been hanging around North American forests and gardens, quietly building up its reputation as a superfood powerhouse that doesn't give a crap about your fancy imported berries. Native Americans weren't fooling around when they used these berries for their traditional medicines and food preservation. The name might sound like it's trying to kill you, but don't let that scare your ass off - these berries are packing some serious health-promoting compounds that make blueberries look like they're not even trying. What makes this plant extra badass is how it can thrive in crappy soil conditions where other plants would just give up and die.

Description

Red Chokeberry is that punk rock plant that stands tall and proud, reaching heights of up to 8 feet like it's trying to pick a fight with small trees. The leaves start off looking all innocent in spring with their bright green color, but by fall, they turn into a crazy show of reds and purples that'll make your other plants look boring as hell. Those bright red berries hang around in clusters like tiny gangs, staying on the plant well into winter when other fruits have bailed. The flowers show up in spring looking all delicate and white, but don't be fooled - this plant is tough as nails. The berries have this intense astringent taste that'll make your mouth feel like it's been to the gym.

Cultivation

Growing this badass berry isn't rocket science, but you better respect its needs or it'll give you the cold shoulder. This plant doesn't discriminate against soil types, but it'll throw a fit if you don't give it decent drainage. Sunlight is its jam, but it'll tolerate partial shade if it has to - just don't expect it to fruit like crazy in the shadows. You'll want to plant these shrubs about 4-6 feet apart because they need their personal space like an angsty teenager. Water them regularly during their first growing season, then they'll basically tell you to piss off and handle themselves.

Medicinal Uses

Antioxidant Power

These berries are loaded with more antioxidants than your body knows what to do with, fighting free radicals like they owe them money. The anthocyanins in these bad boys make other superfoods look like they're not even trying.

Heart Health

This plant takes cardiovascular health seriously, helping to maintain healthy blood pressure and cholesterol levels like a boss. Research shows it can help keep your arteries flexible and happy.

Blood Sugar Control

Chokeberry doesn't mess around when it comes to helping manage blood sugar levels. The compounds in these berries tell glucose to slow its roll.

How to Use